


death nor the grave can part us (so that we only love)

by sorryforthedead



Category: Dickinson (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Post-Season/Series 02, Proposal of sorts, So much fluff you guys... unreal, That finale took me out what can I say, They just love each other so much...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:49:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29843829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sorryforthedead/pseuds/sorryforthedead
Summary: Emily. Emily is the right person, she’s the one Sue knows she could spend her whole life with. She knows she could stay everyday by her side, she knows if she had the chance, she would literally never let go of her. Emily is her whole world, her sun, her stars, her everything. Sue knows that that is the kind of love that is supposed to exist in marriage.orSue realizes that all she wants is Emily, forevermore.
Relationships: Emily Dickinson/Susan Gilbert Dickinson
Comments: 20
Kudos: 144





	death nor the grave can part us (so that we only love)

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys! I've apparently entered my rpf era, the social network fanfic and now this? but Emily and Sue really mean the world to me, I adore them more than I can say, and I really wanted to give them a happy fluffy story to account for all the angst they went through. The finale absolutely killed me, so I just needed to write this. If any of you have a post finale fic in mind as well, I would love to read it. I'll be your biggest fan. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this, please feel free to leave a kudos and a comment!
> 
> The title is from one of Emily's letters to Sue, which I found in Open Me Carefully: Emily Dickinson's Intimate Letters to Sue Huntington Dickinson. I do not own that book, nor do I own the letters, Dickinson, or any of the characters or plotlines mentioned in this fic. Also, if you love Emily and Sue, you definitely should read Open Me Carefully. Life changing you guys.

It’s not long after they reunite that it hits Sue. They’re lying in bed together, the early morning sunlight filtering in through the curtains. Emily’s playing with Sue’s hands, her fingers running over Sue’s delicately, softly, with so much love. Her hand trails up Sue’s left wrist, ghosting over each finger until she pauses, her fingers featherlight on Sue’s ring finger. Her fingers dance up it achingly slow, landing on the golden ring that sits firmly there. Emily wraps her fingers around it, playing with it, twisting it left, right, up, down. Her gaze is locked on it, intently watching as it moves from snug to lose along Sue’s finger. The attention given to her ring turns Sue’s mind to the fact that she hasn’t seen Austin in probably three days. He knows where she is, she knows that, and she knows he’s probably with Jane. Sue finds she couldn’t care less. She’s never been happier than she has in these last three days, never leaving Emily’s side. She’s overjoyed to get to do this again, she doesn’t think anything could be this good.

And that’s when it hits her, as Emily’s inching her wedding ring up and down her finger, she’d be fine if she never saw Austin again. She knows that’s not plausible, she knows they’re married and they’ll have to keep up appearances, the Dickinsons’ don’t get divorced, but beyond that the marriage means _nothing_ to her. This in and of itself is not new, no the thing that hits her is that all of a sudden, marriage as a whole _doesn’t_ mean nothing to her. No, with the right person, marriage could be the most wonderful thing in the world, and Sue knows who the right person is. 

Emily. Emily is the right person, she’s the one Sue knows she could spend her whole life with. She knows she could stay everyday by her side, she knows if she had the chance, she would literally never let go of her. Emily is her whole world, her sun, her stars, her everything. Sue knows that that is the kind of love that is supposed to exist in marriage. 

But she can’t have it. She can’t make Emily her wife, because the world is fucking stupid and ridiculous and in everyone else’s minds Sue is happily married to Austin. But god, she fucking wants it.

Sue focuses her attention back on Emily, knowing it’s not worth it to lose herself in such fanciful dreams. Emily’s gaze is still on the ring, but her eyes have almost unfocused, it’s that look that Sue knows she gets when she’s thinking, when her whole soul is attentive to the beautiful, dark recesses of her mind. Her fingers still lightly play with the ring though, and something in Sue’s stomach twists. All she wants is this girl, for the rest of her life. It shouldn’t be that hard, and she thinks she’s not going to let it be. She is gonna get what she wants, even if the world doesn’t want her to.

The thought makes her smile, makes her want to tug Emily that much closer. She gives into the urge, taking Emily’s restless hand into her own, pressing a soft kiss to the knuckles before softly uttering, “Emily?”

Her girl clues in then, an almost dopey smile crossing her face as she admires their joined hands. “Yeah?” she asks, her voice soft, joyous in a way Sue will never tire of.

“I love you,” she says, relishing in the fact that she just gets to say it.

Emily practically lights up, her smile widening to cross her whole face. “I love you too,” she says, before moving to kiss Sue softly on her lips.

Yeah, Sue was gonna get this forever. She didn’t have any other choice. 

* * *

It takes awhile for her to procure the object she needs for this to work, she has to request it be made, in a fashion that wasn’t suspicious, all in the right size for Emily.

Despite it all, she gets it, and holding it in her hands, knowing she was about to give it to the love of her life, Sue swears she’s almost dizzy from the pure joy. 

She knows this isn’t quite the real thing, but even that acknowledgement can’t pull her down from this high. She is just _so_ happy.

* * *

They’re together that night, it’s Friday, but it doesn’t really matter what day it is, everyday of the week feels wonderful when she’s with Emily. The Evergreens are empty except for the two of them, Austin has rarely been home these days. From what Sue’s heard, he’s been making excuses about work or helping Jane, whatever he can to explain his distance from her. She has done nothing of the sort. She’s barely left the house, barely left Emily's side, only going to order it and then pick it up, and that’s the way she liked it, not having to explain herself to anyone. Just loving the woman she loves.

They’re lying in the parlour, on the couch, wrapped up in each other. They’d been reading together, the new Bleakhouse had come out, but they’d gotten distracted, Emily had fallen asleep to the soft sound of Sue’s voice, and when she’d woken, Sue hadn’t been able to resist kissing her senseless, running her fingers through sleep messy hair and appreciating the soft hum coming from Emily’s lips. It had been the perfect way to spend her day, and Sue knows what would be the perfect way to end it.

Slowly, she untangles herself from Emily, much to her chagrin. Emily groans, grabbing onto her arm, “Don’t go,” she practically begs, tugging Sue back to the couch.

“I’ll be back before you know it baby,” Sue whispers, running her fingers over Emily’s hand as she pries herself away almost unwillingly, she hates to part from her, even for a small amount of time. 

Emily lets her go, and Sue hurries away, grabbing the small box, and not wasting a moment away from her. 

Now though, Sue admits she’s a little nervous. Her walk back to Emily is slightly slower, her hands running anxious circles over the box. What if Emily doesn’t want this? They’ve talked about being together forever, that seems to be what Emily wants, but part of her is a bit worried. Maybe it’s too soon, maybe Emily isn’t ready to trust her yet. She hopes this isn’t the case, because god, it’s all she wants.

Sue enters the room, standing in front of the couch, where Emily is laying, already determined to drag Sue back into her arms, but Sue won’t let her, not right now. If all goes well, Sue expects to spend all weekend in Emily’s arms, but she has to ask this very important question first. “Emily, can you sit up? I want to look at you,” she asks.

Emily shakes her head, squeezing her eyes shut. “Why? Can’t we just cuddle,” she says, and as tempting as it is, Sue needs to get these words out.

“Not right now, I have something really important to ask you,” she says, and she knows the urgency in her voice is recognized, because Emily sits up, her eyes opening wide.

“Is everything okay?” she asks, her voice laced with soft worry and concern.

Sue takes this as the opportunity to drop to her knees in front of Emily, taking one of her hands with the one not currently holding the box. “No, everything will be perfect,” Sue says, “just so long as you say yes to what I am about to ask you.”

Emily’s brow furrows, but she squeezes Sue’s hand, urging her to continue. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking,” she begins, wracking her brain for words that mean as much as she feels, “and I love you so much, Emily. I want to be with you forever, even if we have to hide sometimes. It doesn’t matter to me, all I want is you.”

Eyebrows relaxing, Emily’s smile widens, but she still appears to be a bit confused, even with her joy relating to Sue’s declaration. “I love you too, darling,” she states, setting a stutter in Sue’s heart, “but what’s this about?”

Sue takes a deep breath, delicately unravelling her hand from Emily’s. Once her hand is free, she reveals the box, opening the lid, to a golden ring, one that almost perfectly matches Sue’s. “I can’t actually ask you to marry me,” Sue whispers, “but I want to be your wife. All I want is to know you’re mine forever, and I’m yours, have that commitment to each other that comes with marriage. And I know it will never be legal or official, and you’ll have to wear the ring on your right hand, but I just need to be able to call you my wife when we’re alone. I need to be able to sign my name and think that the Dickinson attached to it comes from you. I just want to be tied to you, emotionally and symbolically forever, no matter what challenges we have to go through.”

Sue pauses, just long enough to take a breath, before meeting Emily’s eyes. “Emily Dickinson, I love you more than I can say. I made the mistake of letting go of you once. I don’t want to do it again. I need you in my life. Please, would you do me the honour of becoming my wife?”

Sue knows she sounds desperate, but part of her is. This is all she wants. There is nothing that would make her happier than to hear Emily say yes. “God,” Emily says, her voice soft.

Heart pounding in her chest, Sue waits for the response. She thinks she catches a hint of awe in Emily’s voice, but she is so scared she’s uncertain whether or not she’s making it up. That is until Emily’s face breaks into the widest smile Sue has ever seen, nearly jumping on her in her haste to get to Sue. “Yes,” she says, nearly yelling it, “yes, god, yes. Please marry me Sue.”

Her smile widens just the same as Emily’s, and god, Sue thought she was happy before. There had never been a moment like this one. “I love you,” Sue says, reaching for the ring, freeing it from its box.

Emily presents her hand to her, her left hand Sue notes, and she thinks it’s perfect for this moment. Things will have to change when they’re out in the world, but now, Emily can wear Sue’s ring on her left hand, and the two of them can be together. Married in every sense of the word.

Sue slips the ring on Emily’s finger, feeling as if everything is truly slipping into place. It’s that perfect physical sign of everything that has happened between them, and when Emily moves the focus away from their hands to cup Sue’s face and tug her into a kiss, Sue swears there’s nowhere in the whole godforsaken world she’d rather be.

* * *

Later, when they’re tangled up together, happiness radiating from both of them, Emily turns to Sue, wrapping their hands together and says, “Sue and Emily Dickinson,” she smiles, “has a ring to it doesn't it?”

“It’s perfect,” Sue says.

“I love you, Mrs. Dickinson,” Emily says.

Sue’s heard that name countless times before, but it wasn’t until this moment that it truly felt right. It had never felt like _her_ name, until now. It makes her heart warmer than it’s ever been. She can’t help but whisper the words right back.

“I love you too, Mrs. Dickinson.”

**Author's Note:**

> so that's all for now, i hope you loved it, kudos and comments are always super appreciated!


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